Perspective
Man, oh man...my heart. It has been quite a year, month, and week. I know that I am a sensitive person. I know that a lot of things affect me deeply, often in ways that don’t even remotely affect those close to me. That’s ok. It’s because of that fact I often am slow to speak/respond (unless you are bleeding out, then I’m all over it, but I digress).
I’m slow to speak because I never want to hurt anyone or cause disruption. I don’t want to be misunderstood and truly want to look from all perspectives. I'm a communicator at heart. I hate disagreement and instinctively seek to find common ground and mediate without even thinking about it. With all of that said, I am speaking now while praying my heart is heard, but if not, I’m speaking anyway.
George Floyd.
There is not a word strong enough to express the degree of….hell...all of it...all of the many emotions surging within...Evil...yes, evil is as close a word as I can find. His horrific death is not the beginning and I’m afraid it isn’t the end. It NEEDS to be. Both police brutality AND the racism that seethes beneath the surface of our culture...our culture founded on “All Men are created Equal,” need to end. It is time for change. Lasting, systemic change. Change that everyone takes part in. Change found when each person looks within with honest eyes. Change that only happens when one chooses to listen with the aim to truly hear. Change that only happens when we are BRAVE enough to have hard conversations.
The truth is this is NOT a black and brown problem. This is a white problem! Why? Because the abused is not tasked with fixing the abuser!!
In this case, the abused (our brothers and sisters of color) can't choose to leave their abuser...our society, our culture, fellow humans. They can’t even change the thing that is being held against them, the color of their skin...nor would they want to. This travesty of racism has to stop.
Here’s a thought...how come every time a protest for equality for POC occurs it is immediately met with "what about me" statements from the Caucasian community? Don’t you see that is like having a conversation with someone who is sharing they were abused and you respond with, "yeah, but I was slapped this one time." It doesn’t mean what happened to you isn’t important but it’s not the subject of the conversation in that moment!
For me personally, this is more than police brutality and murder, though it’s an enormous part. [Sidebar-police should be held to a higher standard, not lesser. They are tasked w/leadership and upholding the laws. When they break them the penalty should be stronger... the same for our country's leaders/politicians.]
I clearly remember learning about slavery in elementary school and being beyond appalled. I was totally incredulous. How could this be? My mind couldn't wrap around it then and it still can't. It is SKIN COLOR, what the hell? Hating someone simply because they are a different color then you is just stupid! There's no other way to describe it. It's like refusing a gift and trashing it because you don't like the wrapping paper. Ludicrous. It's like hating everyone who wears purple. Smh
It's horrific enough slavery thrived to the point it was culturally expected and acceptable. Then it took nearly another 100 years to end segregation. Another injustice our system perpetuated as if it were normal.
WHAT is it? What are white people afraid? Do we have so little security within ourselves that we have to keep those different from us under our control? Enough is Enough! If you truly believe all people are created equal then band together to choke out the evil of racism, exclusivity, and discrimination.
I can speak up against injustice all day every day. I can pray, and stand in the gap for my black and brown siblings, I can have these discussions with friends and colleagues but despite everything I have been through in my life, including the years of abuse and control by a trafficker, I can never fully understand what it is like to live Every. Single. Solitary moment of my life guarded, oppressed, and in fear, because the color of my skin stirs evil and bias in someone else's heart. And if you are not a person of color, neither can you.
Please don’t compare the bullying or discrimination you have endured as a white person to this…it’s not the same, I promise. Hurtful, yes. impactful, yes. Sometimes life-altering, yes. The same...no. I grew up in poverty, sharing clothes with my mom, living in a trailer (not necessarily lauded by my peers), overweight, and with glasses that were so heavy they wouldn’t stay on my face. The extreme teasing and bullying I endured…NOT THE SAME!
Some Perspective:
-If I go for a walk in a hoodie, I am not at risk of being labeled thug, criminal or drug dealer.
-If I enter an exclusive jewelry or clothing store my every move is not watched while one finger is on the “9” waiting for me to make a wrong move.
-If I go to a job interview my “natural’ hair is not spurned, slighted, nor am I told to cut it.
-If something at my office goes missing no one looks to me automatically thinking I must have taken it.
-If I were suspected of breaking into homes the likelihood vigilantes are going to stalk and gun me down, is fairly moot.
-If I try to buy a new home, the odds the realtor will steer me to a different neighborhood = rare.
-I have no problem finding personal care products for my hair and body type. Bandaids on my skin are nearly invisible.
-Face it….I do not experience discrimination because of my skin color...because...my race is everywhere, wholly accepted, and pretty much celebrated to the neglect of others.
Here’s the thing...having white privilege is not your fault. It does exist though. That doesn’t mean it has to stay that way. My white brothers and sisters....we are NOT at risk of having our history rewritten, our jobs stolen, our lives negatively impacted because other people are also given opportunities that we receive. There is enough love and respect to go around. We do not have to have the corner on everything.
Celebrate other people groups. Celebrate the beauty of diversity. Celebrate the enormous cultural difference rather than fear or shun them.
Friend, you do not have to attend a March to make a change. You do need to look inside. Is there change needed there? Look around you...within your family and friends. It's there change needed there? What about at work, church, and your social clubs? Is there change needed there?
What stereotypes have you unconsciously allowed into your belief system? It's fairly difficult to live in a culture and not pick up its dysfunctional ways. One needs to be proactive to identify and root out inaccurate and stereotypical perceptions.
It is easy to say, it's not my problem. I'm good. I have no bias, my family has no bias.
Let me ask you this...if you were walking to your car and a person in front of you was bound in chains and the key to free them was lying only a few feet away wouldn't you grab it and help?
Of course, you would!! This is the same thing! You have the key. We all do. USE it.
Love is never silent in the face of evil
Love stands in the gap
Love listens
Love makes room
Love shares